have you checked that you have the latest Portico update for Windows Phone 8, installed on your device? check via Settings > Phone Update. if you do, also check that you have the latest Nokia system app updates from the Store, and try performing a soft reset (pressing volume down and power buttons together until the phone vibrates).
I have not come across the issue you described with older iDrive versions. What normally happens is bluetooth pairs but phonebook does not transfer. A car software update is required to resolve this. Once updated, not only will your contcts transfer, your car should also read incoming sms's for you. Not the easiest thing to comvince MW to update software. They will only do it on a needs only basis. You may have to convince them of the need.
No hardware update is required. All it needs is the latest software. But like I said, BMW Irelands policy is they will not install the update unless it is necessary and unfortunately pairing a phone which is not on their approved list does not qualify. The only approved Nokia on their list for your car is probably the 6230i. I went in to them and all they did was to bring out a 6230 and pair it and pronounced it working. When I produced my phone, they said it wasn't supported. Problem solved when I started having issues with the HUD and they had to update software for that. All my phones started working after update installed. If you are unable to convince them then €1200 is not worth it and you should just return the phone. Just to let you know, I have not had problems pairing my 920 and 820 with BMW's. Must be over 10 now at this stage.
